I have reported that I find the NICU to be a holy place. And it is! I would never want to diminish the importance and sanctity of the life-giving care to those babies in that unit. But since I started my volunteer services as a Cuddler, there have been several things happen that are rather funny. At least they are now.
One of those things was on my very first night in the NICU. There are several things you have to do before you can hold a newborn baby. The first thing you have to do is remove any jewelry (bacteria hides under jewelry). So watches, wedding bands, bracelets etc. have to be removed. Then you have to "scrub in." The NICU provides two large sinks with special antibacterial soap. The soap is a self-contained scrubber and tool for cleaning under fingernails. It is then necessary to scrub up to the elbows under the running water for several minutes.
So far. So good. You know, when somebody says "That's obvious" it means that it's obvious to them. In this case, it should have immediately obvious to me, but it wasn't. I didn't figure it out until my next visit. When I stood at the sink to scrub my hands, I couldn't find a way to turn the water on. I pushed and pulled various things around the sink and nothing happened. Then I noticed two foot pedals below the sink and figured that was how to operate it. I was standing at the sink on the left and there was a sink to my right. Since there were two pedals below me I decided the left pedal was for my sink and the right for the other. Right along now you've already figured out the "obvious" but the bulb had not yet flashed for me. So I pressed the left pedal with my foot and started washing. The water got hot quite fast. But I kept washing my hands. Then it got very hot. But I kept washing my hands. Then it was scalding hot! I should have thought of any number of reasons why this was not the way to work it, but all I thought was "Wow ! They're serious about decontamination!" I completed the procedure and proceeded to the unit. These are at least a couple of things I should have realized up front. 1. There are two pedals under each sink. Wouldn't you think there is a hot and a cold under each one? 2. They want you to be free of germs when you hold these babies but they don't want you to have to visit the burn unit while you're here.
The next week when I returned to the unit I was a bit apprehensive about scrubbing in. I was dreading it really. Someone was standing at the sink to the left and I stood at the one on the right. I got my soap ready and when I looked down I noticed the two pedals under my sink. And I noticed again the two pedals under the other sink. Just as reality was sinking in, I noticed the pedal to the left was engraved H and on the pedal to the right was engraved C. "Note to self: You're a complete imbecile."
Another thing happened several weeks later when I was at the front desk answering the phone. I am just beginning to see the humor in the situation. At the time it wasn't funny at all; it was just embarrassing. To be a kidder sometimes I take myself way too seriously. Just like the situation with the scrubbing in, there were several warnings that something unusual was about to happen in the NICU. Two of the nurses donned scrubs and had masks hanging around their necks. Their gloved hands were in the air like they were prepared for surgery. I noticed and I was curious about it, but I didn't think anything of it. A few minutes later the phone rang. I answered it and a very excited female voice said, "We need you in the OR now !" Well, she did say "YOU" didn't she? I said, "This is David Helms. I'm just a volunteer are you sure you have the right person?" She said again even more urgently, "We need you in the OR now!" While I was still processing how she even knew me, she hung up. When the phone rang immediately,I thought it would be best to let it ring. It only rang once. And the two nurses ran out of the unit like they were going to a fire.
"Note to self: There are emergencies in the OR that involve the NICU. It is of vital importance that these nurses who are trained to save the lives of newborn babies anticipate such emergencies and respond immediately. Seconds count. When they say "you" they mean "the unit" not "you." (see the previous note to self).
Another thing that took several weeks to sink in are how many clocks are in the unit. While rocking the babies I had noticed the digital clocks on the monitors and I had noticed the wall clocks here and there. But all of a sudden I realized that there were clocks everywhere. Small clocks, big clocks, digital clocks, clocks with big black hands and a red second hand. Clocks in the rooms. Clocks on the walls. Lots of clocks. So I asked a nurse about it and she said, "Everything we do here happens at a certain time. We feed them at a certain time. We give them their medicine at a certain time. We change them and check certain things at a certain time. Then we have to log the time with the vital statistics. These clocks are very important." Makes perfectly good sense.
Last night, just for my information, I asked another nurse about how she uses the clocks and she quipped, "I use my cellphone. I don't pay any attention to them."
Whereas there are funny things that happen there, the NICU is certainly not fun and games. Nothing is done without great thought and care. Everything that happens within those walls happens for the welfare of those infants. Some of the stories there are heart-breaking. I try to leave those babies there. But I can't. I bring them all home with me every night. I think about them. I pray for them. I miss them. I look forward to seeing them again as soon as possible. When I agreed to cuddle newborns I had no idea what I had signed up for. I had no idea what the job required in emotional energy. But with all challenges that confront me, I am finding resources within and without to help me deal with how I feel about those tiny children. And I try to laugh so that I won't cry. But it never works.
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