The Reason for the Season(IMHO)

On Lakeview Drive in the Rossville/Ft. Oglethorpe area of Georgia, this morning I drove past a Baptist church that I drive by quite often. Their sign read, “Is Jesus the reason for the season?”  This sign set me off (as most church signs do).

Even if Jesus is the most important person in the world to you, and Christmas is your most important holiday, and thinking about Jesus is the most important aspect of Christmas, it is impossible for “Jesus” to be the only reason for the season. The “holiday” season seems to start a week or so before Thanksgiving. Families make plans to travel or to stay at home and entertain family and friends. They do many things to celebrate Thanksgiving together. It seems to be okay to say “Happy Holidays” before and during Thanksgiving.  After Thanksgiving, though, there’s a change. The people who believe saying “Merry Christmas” is the only authentic way to celebrate CHRISTmas appear in droves. The “Keep Christ in Christmas” and “Jesus is the reason for the season” directives are displayed all over the place. It is no longer appropriate to say “Happy Holidays.” That phrase dishonors “Christ in Christmas”—the reason for the season.

For me it seems that “Happy Holidays” is inclusive and “Merry Christmas”, especially with the emphasis put on it by the “evangelicals, is exclusive. There are many “holiday” traditions that are celebrated around December 25^th other than Christmas. “Happy Holidays” is a way to honor and include these traditions during the “Christmas” season. "Merry Christmas" is included in "Happy Holidays".Some "holiday" traditions are sacred; others are secular. The “evangelicals” cry “foul”, though, that these people have no business embracing “Christmas” and that Christians have every right to insist that “Merry Christmas” is the only authentic way to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

But as I said, even if the birth of Jesus is the only reason December 25^th exists for you, then you still have serious problems with the adage that Jesus is the ONLY reason for the season. Try celebrating just Jesus without the trappings of Christmas. During Christmas you enjoy or endure family gatherings. During Christmas you enjoy, or at least participate, in the exchange of gifts. These gifts are wrapped in beautiful paper and adorned with string and bows. During Christmas you decorate your home, inside and out, with bright colors, trees, special ornaments and lighting and many other things. Some of these ornaments evoke love and joy for special people who gave them to you. And let’s not forget Santa Claus and now The Elf on the Shelf during this celebration. Santa arrives in his sleigh pulled by eight tiny reindeer and this elf moves around the house through the days leading up to the 25^th,  bringing surprises and playing tricks, and then on Christmas Eve disappears to return to the North Pole or wherever you tell your children he goes. All of this, even if you claim that “Jesus in the Reason for the Season”, is a part of the celebration.

Finally, even if you do none of these things—no family gatherings, no exchange of gifts, no holiday foods, no carols or candle light services, no Santa and elves,  no trips to Grandma’s house and only gather your family around the fire on Christmas Eve to read the Biblical narrative, especially Luke chapter 2, then Jesus is not the only reason for the season. In these old stories you’ll find, not only the baby in a manger of straw, but angels, shepherds, wise men,  Mary and Joseph, the natal star and others in the cast of places and characters that are a vital part of the story. If Jesus had just appeared in that manger with nothing or no one around Him, as a human being He would have died of exposure and starvation.

So celebrate “Jesus” during the season. Exclude, if you will, all other people and traditions besides what happens for you on December 24^th and 25^th, try your best to evoke a feeling of guilt in those who do other things besides “Jesus” during the holidays. But try as you will, you cannot escape the trappings that make Christmas “Christmas” for millions of people. And, please, at least say, “Jesus is my reason for the season” so as not to suggest that He is the only reason for all of us. 

A Very Short Speech

Do you have memories of events that took place even 49 years ago, and you still feel embarrassed about them? I had that happen yesterday.  Yesterday I was in Elba, Alabama and drove by the First Baptist Church of Elba. The memory was as raw and as clear as the night it  happened.

In 1970, at age 17, I was in the front end of a horrible time in my life. After reading the book, In His Steps, I decided, like the main character in the book, to ask before everything I did, “What would Jesus do?” or what is now known as WWJD. On the surface this seems like a good idea. It seems like it would help any Christian to discern the will of God and act on that discernment. My problem at the time, which was a huge problem as problems go, was that I took that suggestion literally. Before EVERYTHING that I did, I asked myself “What would Jesus do?” and based my actions on that answer.

During this time I also interpreted the Bible as literally as possible. I read specific Bible verses and tried to believe and act accordingly. In this case, the verse I read was "When they bring you before the synagogues and the rulers and the authorities, do not worry about how or what you are to speak in your defense, or what you are to say”. Luke 12:11 In the first place, no one was putting me up against any rulers or authorities; I was asked to speak at a Valentine’s banquet for the youth group at the First Baptist Church of Elba, Alabama. In the second place, it is not logical to think that God would have a problem for me to prepare for that speech.  But I took that verse to mean that I was not to prepare and should trust God in the moment with what to say.  

The night came for the banquet. I dressed up for the occasion and drove the 25 miles from Enterprise to Elba. It was a typical Baptist banquet with a nice meal that was probably roast beef, green beans, mashed potatoes and a roll with some sort of cake for dessert. There were about 25 young people in that room all dressed up and looking forward to a nice talk. The meal was enjoyed by all, the youth director introduced me and I walked to the podium to speak praying all the way for the words to deliver. All eyes and ears were turned to me.  Here is the entire speech.

“On Valentine’s Day we talk about love. There are many types of love that we have for each other. There’s the love of parents for their children, children for their parents, the love of husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends. But the greatest love of all is the love that God has for us.” That’s it. That was the speech. Since God gave me nothing else to say, I sat down. I wanted to melt into my chair. 

A couple of years ago, my brother ran into the guy who was the youth director at that time. They discussed the banquet and the speech, and shared a nice belly laugh at my expense. Since that fateful night 49 years ago, I have never failed to prepare for a speech. When I give any sort of speech, I talk from, not an outline, but a manuscript. I deliver it without reading it, but every word is in front of me.

It took about five years and an experience with a puppy and some turnip greens for me to begin to emerge from this black hole I had created for myself. Can you imagine how difficult it was for God to get through to someone who put Him first in all his thoughts, but in a very perverted way? And yet He did. The next time you find yourself in Elba, Alabama, drive by the First Baptist Church, think about that banquet and enjoy a good laugh. You’ll feel better and I will too.

Test post

Dear blog reader,
I am working through a technical difficulty so this is just part of that test. Had this been a real blog post, it would have been about something weighing on my mind and heart besides Blogspot. So please continue with your regularly scheduled activity. If you don't mind "liking" this post, I would appreciate it.

David
"Draw a circle of power around yourself and stand in that circle." Black Elk, Holy man of the Oglala Lakota Sioux(1863-1950) Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, S. Dakota

Dealing with Problems

I don't like to have problems. When I have problems, I immediately try to find a way to fix them. In this case, what I have done to fix it has created an even bigger problem, an interpersonal one with someone I care about deeply. Meanwhile, I have to cope with both problems the best I know how.

Twenty seven years of counseling has paid off. I am now armed with a multitude of ways to deal with problems in a constructive and redemptive way. Here are some of the ways I find "help in times of trouble" (the Psalms). I recommend them all to you:
1. Recognize that either the problem will go away or that you will learn to deal with the problem and move on.
2. Employ "emotional resources".  All of us, on any given day, have limited emotional resources. At any particular moment in the day, we have to choose how to spend those resources. Emotional resources are built on elaborate brain chemistry. Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin and Endorphins(D.O.P.E. are our friends, but at any given moment, these neurotransmitters have a limited capacity to help us. We set those limits. If we block those resources with worry, fear, guilt, bitterness, grief, drugs and alcohol, then the good stuff in our nervous system is unavailable.  D.O.S.E are depleted and other body chemicals, such as cortisol and adrenaline,  accommodate our mood and your problems feel worse. Learn to focus on the good stuff you are experiencing in spite of the problem. Think about something else that you love and enjoy. Think of all the good things that are going on right now. These thoughts activate these DOPE chemicals and they flood your nervous system with good feelings of hope, redemption and grace.
3. Develop a "wait and see" attitude.  Once you have done all you can do to deal with the problem and its consequences, it's important to leave it alone and let it work its way out. Years ago while in the middle of a business problem where I had messed up, my boss put her hand on my shoulder and said, "David, things have a way of working out."  I have found this to be true.
4.Do something that you enjoy. Phone a friend. Go outside and take a walk, especially in the woods if woods are available. If not, a walk around the block or even a treadmill will help. These positive activities activate the D.O.P.E. chemicals and you find yourself feeling better in spite of the problem. In a way, at this point, you have no problems.
5.Be kind to yourself. When I consider the Golden Rule, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you", I think about it in a different way. "Treat yourself at least as kindly as you treat everybody else in similar circumstances. Include yourself in your circle of love and forgiveness for friends, family and strangers."
6. Finally, pray about it. Well, you may want to consider that first.  AA, in helping people with their addictions, includes invoking your "Higher Power" in times of stress and temptation.  Name your Higher Power and ask for help.Some things demand Divine intervention. The first Bible verse I memorized at Vacation Bible School when I was five years old, was "What time I am afraid, I will trust in Thee." Psalm 56:3 KJV

A funny thing happened while I was writing this. My problems went away. Well, actually, now that I have finished writing, they are still there, but I don't feel as bad about them. Sooner or later they will be resolved. Meanwhile, I'm going to eat a Moon Pie, drink some chocolate milk and read a book--"a very present help in the time of trouble"Psalm 46:1.

"Enjoy your holiday."

I dropped by my bank this morning to put something in my safe deposit box.  As I was leaving the bank, the woman who opened my box said, "Enjoy your holiday."  The comment caught me off guard.

My first thought was, "What holiday is it?"  It's not Labor Day or Memorial Day. It's not Lincoln's Birthday or the 4th of July. "Then what holiday is it?", I wondered. And it set me to thinking. I didn't think very long before I realized that what most people say in her place is "I hope you enjoy your holidays." That makes more sense.

But then I thought, "I wonder if December 3rd is actually a holiday?"  A quick Google search yielded these results. Among other things, each year December 3rd commemorates at least these three holidays, The International Day of Persons with Disabilities, Giving Tuesday and the International Spirit of the Game Day. The first one "focuses on the empowerment of persons with disabilities." The second one encourages generosity, especially toward charities and needy people. The last one is "the mindful behavior practiced by players worldwide in a mutual effort to protect the basic joy of play".

Regarding "the holidays", the Thanksgiving and Christmas season has never felt to me like "holidays."  With one exception--as a student it was always a relief to get out "for the Christmas holidays." Not having to go to school and study at home for a couple of weeks was a respite that I always enjoyed. With that exception, "the holidays" have for me always required a lot of mental effort. During Thanksgiving and the days leading up to Christmas Eve were not "holidays." There's the wreath that I always put on the house. This requires climbing very high on an extension ladder, careful to not fall and hurt myself. I've never fallen. But I could. I never enjoy being on a ladder. The  "holidays" usually require a lot of travel. This year is no exception with three out of town trips on the docket. Travel then requires driving long distances sometimes with weather issues and traffic tie ups,  airports(TSA and boarding passes) and other necessary evils. Even when none of that is much of a problem, there's just the stress of the possibility of these things that "bugs me up" (as my brother says). None of this feels like any sort of "holiday" to me. Ho Ho Ho!

Regarding the "Spirit of the Game Day", if I'm honest I don't really "enjoy" a game I care about until my team is in a good position to win the game. I find watching very stressful up until that point. The problem with this perspective is that many games are not decided until the final minutes and seconds. My counselor tells me that my gut and my stress do not transfer through the TV and actually affect the players or the outcome of the game. The stress only affects me. Cognitively, that makes sense; emotionally that reality has never saved me from the angst of the game. During this year's Iron Bowl, Auburn, my favorite team, was not the clear winner until the quarterback took a knee with a little over a minute to play. Watching the replay the next day was far less stressful. I did enjoy that activity.

Back to the lady at the bank. Maybe she knew about the three holidays that occur each December 3rd. I doubt it, but maybe so. If not, I'm sure she sincerely hoped that I would enjoy all of the "holiday season." I wish I could relax and enjoy "the playing of the game" and watching "the holidays" unfold.  With a lot of good counsel and emotional effort, each year I am getting better.

Today, December 3rd 2019, is actually a holiday of sorts for me. Because of retirement, I have nothing on my schedule today but a doctor's visit and going to the gym. Neither of those things involve any stress or any great emotional or mental effort. And at the moment I'm writing, one of my favorite activities, while listening to beautiful music by Daniel Elder. Or is it the other way around--while I'm listening to beautiful music, I'm writing? Either way I find the experience both enjoyable and relaxing.

Among other things, Wednesday, December 4th is "International Cheetah Day." Am I supposed to run or just appreciate the prowess of this animal? Since I don't enjoy running, I think I'll just pause and enjoy the latter. Apparently, every day is a  holiday.